Funniest Things Ever Said By Women Giving Birth

'When my brother was born, they had to use forceps to get him out. My mom saw them and screamed "THOSE ARE SALAD TONGS! YOU ARE NOT PUTTING ANY GODDAMN KITCHENWARE IN THERE!"'

'I was high on meds at the time, I was begging for BBQ ribs in between contractions. "C'mon, honey! The nurses will never know!" They were standing right there.'

'My husband told me when I was breathing the laughing gas I screamed "I'm lady Darth Vader!" as I was pushing. Then I asked the doctor if he felt my tonsils when he has his arm up there.'

'My mum said, "What did I have?" and the nurse said, "You haven't had anything yet, dear." She was high on gas, my mum...'

'My mothers labour was extremely short, I was born within an hour. So that means that she went from experiencing minimal pain, to extreme pain with little time to adjust. When my dad was driving her to the hospital, he unfortunately had to stop for gas. He went into pay, and just then an elderly man in a wheelchair stopped him, asking him to buy cigarettes for him as the store was not wheelchair accessible. My mom then proceeded to lean out the window, yelling "DONT HELP THE CRIPPLE."'

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